On Forgiveness: Who are you to hurt me?

Hullo,

Wow, it's been ages! A month, I think. To be honest, I really wanted to write, but I had absolutely nothing to write, or so I thought. I actually had a whole lot of ideas in my jotter. I'll be reeling them out as time goes on. I'm excited.

I have had this post as a draft for over a month, I was super excited when I was writing it, but for some reason, the momentum dropped, and I never got around to posting it, possibly because it's umm quite, umm sensitive? I think that's why, but I figured this is my blog and I am allowed to have and share my opinions here.

Here goes.

I just woke up from the bed. It's 9:33am and I am about to say something super daring. If my husband ever cheats on me, by the grace of Jesus Christ, I will forgive him. 

I have been thinking about this for a while now. And it's safe to say, that I have concluded that I will forgive him. I'm very sure it won't happen lol, and I am super sure of my loyalty, so it's not a question of  'I'm pretty sure you are saying this because you plan to cheat'.  Hell no!  Would I be hurt to the bones?  Yeah! I'll probably cry a lot. Probably?  Definitely. But by God's grace, I will forgive him. If you notice, I'm talking about the ability if God's grace. 

I had a friend tell me, (hi Tolani) tell me that the two things that can end his relationship are if he finds out his girlfriend isn't a believer, or she decides to leave, after all, he can't force her to be in a relationship she doesn't want to be in. So, you see, the bar is pretty high. He mentioned cheating, but that wasn't strong enough, I can't remember what else he mentioned, but those seemingly horrifying things that break relationships up these days won't cut it with him. 

Absolutely true for me.

I do not fault anybody for not forgiving a cheating partner, it's a sad thing no one should ever go through, so, if one chooses not to forgive, I would never fault them.

However, let me make a case. I want you to understand why I have chosen to be forgiving of something like this 

First of all, I'd like to say that the position of the heart towards these things is very vital. I saw a video where a guy was saying his vows and he said something along the lines of "I am forgiving you for the future mistakes you will make". Of course, it sounded sweet, but it was more than sweet, the words carry so much depth in them. He has his heart conditioned in this particular way. 

Now, to the case. I'm talking as a Christian here, using the best example I could ever use - Jesus.
I know we all know he died for us,  I mean we all say it. Sometimes I wonder if it has grown on us, and all the novelty of it has worn out, but when we allow ourselves to ruminate on it as often as possible,  we'll stop thinking so highly of ourselves. "Who are you to hurt me?" we think, while we continually hurt people knowingly or unknowingly.

I mean, the reason Jesus, blameless man died, was because of us.  He took all our present, past and future sins, and God decided to forgive all of them. I dunno, but that makes me weak, he didn't stop there,  we (the church) are married to him, despite our flaws, failings,  and our shortcomings, he still loves us.

I don't know, (or I do know), but, I think that when we truly consider how much God has decided to close his eyes to our obvious faults, who are we to not emulate the virtue of forgiving. And that's not all, it may not be something we even need to 'emulate' it is something that has been bestowed on us by virtue of Grace. We have the ability to forgive the biggest of all sins through God's grace.  Of course, we'll be hurt when people do bad things to us, terribly hurt, and it won't be easy to forgive, because it's not in our nature to, but with God's grace, and his love that we have, it's actually possible. I guess we would just ask God to help us. 

So, like I said earlier, I understand if anyone wouldn't be willing to forgive due to the hurt,  but if we condition our hearts, probably we might find it a little bit easier to forgive. 

Have you read the book, Redeeming love written by Francine Rivers? I absolutely recommend it if you haven't. It captures all that love is. 

What say you? 

Much love,
Fifi.


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