Fifi's diary

Image source: Pinterest  In 2016, I started rediscovering myself. In all honesty, I wish I had started much earlier, but I am thankful that I didn't have to wait for much longer. It's been a very long journey filled with growth, learning, unlearning, challenges, love, tears and much more. Sometimes, I look back and wonder what I was using my mind for; whether I was thinking at all. I was growing okay physically, but moving at snail speed spiritually, emotionally, and intellectually. I just went along with the flow, doing nothing to consciously move forward, doing nothing intentionally, I wasn't even preparing for my future, and I was in my final year. Wow! Beats me too. I look back and I am proud. I have come a very long way from where I used to be. Of course, during the past three to four years, going through the motions of growth, it didn't really feel like it, but now, I see tremendous growth. I definitely still have a long way to go, and I really look for...

Feeling: overwhelmed with love.  Time: Wrote this five days ago, shortly before I retired for the day.  Isn't it funny how we know what to do but for some reason we find ourselves holding back?  I have lots of big dreams, dreams that scare me; dreams I feel are only possible so many years away from now; dreams I feel are too big for me to handle right now; dreams that require huge and bold steps. Dreams that push me out of my comfort zone. While I understand that my comfort zone won't in any way help me grow to be the kind of woman I want to be, sometimes, I want to be there for just a little while. It feels like so many pillows around me protecting me from the harsh realities that this life brings my way. Feels like the perfect shield. It actually is. There's just a huge con to it; no growth. Absolutely no growth. So, while I want to grow, I want to be protected. Sigh* I can't have both. I can only choose one. I choose growth It's been said that every...

Feeling : Loved Time: 1:48 pm Growth is a word that's been at the back of my mind for a while now. Some days ago, my brother was telling me about how he felt he hadn't learnt so much in this one year of guitar training; he felt he should have been better. He was downloading some of his you tube videos, and he was like, "I should be this good already'. I reminded him that those ones were probably taught by physical teachers and have been at it for years and years. I told him that as far as I was concerned, I think he has come such a long way. His constant dedication and commitment to getting better is worthy of note. He has no teacher, mind you. I told him every one around him has clearly seen the growth in him, and he'll get better as years go by. I have been feeling this way of late, seeing everyone else do stuff, genuinely celebrating their growth, and clearly despising mine, but we all learn. It's easier to encourage someone else. It's easi...

Feeling: Coffeeish Time : 1:26 p.m Hulloo, welcome back to Fifi's diary. Today, I'm gonna talk about natural hair care (the basic things I know) in honour of my beautiful curls which are like a year and some weeks old. Just so you know , I took this myself .  On a norms, I'm not overly concerned about length (both hair length and time I started this whole natural thingy) and all, in fact, it was during the camp period that I actually took full note of this. My hair was more popular than me. Everywhere I went people would be like "is that your hair or a wig?" Boys crushed on my hair, girls wished they had my hair (I dunno why). If we (my friends and I) actually decided to start a business based on how many people asked to touch my hair, I'd be a billionaire.  Another question people ask me is "what did you do to your hair, tell me, what are the things you used?"  and then, I always reply saying "nothing, really. I just use...

Hey fam!! How've you been all week? Feels like a long time since I've written here. Anyways, moving on to what I'll talk about today. This post has been drafted out for like over two months, but at the time I was drafting it, I was in no position to talk to anybody about it, but today, today today, I will write about it, because I'm consciously learning to be happy no matter what. Dang!!! Guys, it's hard, but the results are worth it. So, yeah, you probably have a hint on what I'll be talking about.  BE HAPPY. Many times, you won't find yourself in a beautiful situation, many times, your emotions will try to bring you down, human beings will make you mad, annoyed, sad, disappointed and all kind of things, but you know what? It's really up to you to make yourself happy. There's some kind of  JOY  that comes from being happy, less burdens (a very amazing feeling). The thing is if you want to keep looking at all these things, you won't be a happy...

Yeah, you've probably heard that Yoruba phrase countless times. My dad's a teacher/preacher lol I dunno which ( he said he'll explain it to me fully later), but sha the public calls him "pastor"  which automatically means that I'm an "omo pastor". Now, it's not that I don't like that my dad is a pastor, I'm cool with it, but what I don't like is that I'm tagged "omo pastor". Why's it that the doctor's child isn't called "omo doctor" or the engineer's child "omo engineer ". I'll tell you why I don't like it. Not only for me, but for the other "omo pastors", but first, I'd like to tell you that it's the pastors God called, not the children. You must have heard people say that  pastors children are worse than other kids. I don't believe it. I'm not saying I'm a saint or anything, I'm far from that, but do you know why it would seem as though th...