You'll die if you don't talk!!!
Dear Diary,
I feel really quiet this morning, I wonder why. perhaps, many things are running through my mind( Im human, that definitely needs to happen) Im supposed to be out doing stuff, or sleeping( you know how much I love sleep), but then, Im bothered about something. We all talk you know, but do we communicate? Yeah, Im bothered about communication. Ive heard several times that communication is important in life and relationships (all kinds of relationships), yeah I know. We all have things that we never say out loud, things that have to be said out loud ironically.
You know, If theres any skill I lack in life, its the ability to communicate ( Jeez I just remembered I have a meeting with somebody who wants to know me more, but Ive been procrastinating because Im scared Ill have nothing to say.). So, as I was saying, Im lacking in that skill, but Im trying really hard to work on it. I pride myself in the fact that I could be talkative, its only if you know me well you can attest to this lol, but I like avoiding deep conversations no matter how much I know I have to say, or need to say, Id prefer the’ funner’ topics, the safe topics, I have many unsaid things that I should have said, or that I need to say, but I cant ( I actually can, but I choose not to), If someone does something to me or not necessarily, I wont say anything, not because Im evil or anything like that, not because Im holding a grudge, but because I always make up excuses for the actions of the person. Lets give an example.
DENNIS: hello Lois, lets hangout tomorrow
FIFI: YAAYY!!! thatll be awesome , well have so much fun
DENNIS: Yeah! cant wait.
*The next day
DENNIS : Hunnay whats up, Im sorry I cant make it blah blah blah
FIFI: Awwn no problem, its okay (Its not Okay!! Its not Okay at all!! Okay, dont let me be too harsh, maybe what he has to do is really important, maybe some other time).
Some other time comes, but this other time, hes really tired, he cant hangout , and Ill still be like really sad, but Ill at the same time say something like Why are you being inconsiderate the guy is tired, he must have had so much to do, its not like he doesnt want to, youre fun to be with you know and then I keep making up so many excuses, but I cant talk, because I dont want to seem unreasonable, I cant talk because I dont want to seem insensitive. But you know what Im learning? Youll die if you dont talk. Not physically of course. Have you ever blown air into a balloon? Stupid question I know, but have you noticed that when you blow air into it, and the pressure becomes too much it Freaking bursts!!! I dont want to burst, you dont want to burst.
I feel really quiet this morning, I wonder why. perhaps, many things are running through my mind( Im human, that definitely needs to happen) Im supposed to be out doing stuff, or sleeping( you know how much I love sleep), but then, Im bothered about something. We all talk you know, but do we communicate? Yeah, Im bothered about communication. Ive heard several times that communication is important in life and relationships (all kinds of relationships), yeah I know. We all have things that we never say out loud, things that have to be said out loud ironically.
You know, If theres any skill I lack in life, its the ability to communicate ( Jeez I just remembered I have a meeting with somebody who wants to know me more, but Ive been procrastinating because Im scared Ill have nothing to say.). So, as I was saying, Im lacking in that skill, but Im trying really hard to work on it. I pride myself in the fact that I could be talkative, its only if you know me well you can attest to this lol, but I like avoiding deep conversations no matter how much I know I have to say, or need to say, Id prefer the’ funner’ topics, the safe topics, I have many unsaid things that I should have said, or that I need to say, but I cant ( I actually can, but I choose not to), If someone does something to me or not necessarily, I wont say anything, not because Im evil or anything like that, not because Im holding a grudge, but because I always make up excuses for the actions of the person. Lets give an example.
DENNIS: hello Lois, lets hangout tomorrow
FIFI: YAAYY!!! thatll be awesome , well have so much fun
DENNIS: Yeah! cant wait.
*The next day
DENNIS : Hunnay whats up, Im sorry I cant make it blah blah blah
FIFI: Awwn no problem, its okay (Its not Okay!! Its not Okay at all!! Okay, dont let me be too harsh, maybe what he has to do is really important, maybe some other time).
Some other time comes, but this other time, hes really tired, he cant hangout , and Ill still be like really sad, but Ill at the same time say something like Why are you being inconsiderate the guy is tired, he must have had so much to do, its not like he doesnt want to, youre fun to be with you know and then I keep making up so many excuses, but I cant talk, because I dont want to seem unreasonable, I cant talk because I dont want to seem insensitive. But you know what Im learning? Youll die if you dont talk. Not physically of course. Have you ever blown air into a balloon? Stupid question I know, but have you noticed that when you blow air into it, and the pressure becomes too much it Freaking bursts!!! I dont want to burst, you dont want to burst.
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