Being (not) friends with exes. Plus story time

Feeling: Kai I dun know. 
Time: 7: something am

I have been binge watching Skinny Girl in Transit on YouTube for the past three days, I think. I'm not watching today, because, I want to use sense to manage my data for the next two days. God help me.

So sha, I was about to go for my second round of sleep, when my mind went to a scene (Spoiler alert!!! If you haven't watched it, please go to the next paragraph.) where Tiwa went to meet her ex, Kola and wanted to hear him say what he wanted to say.  Of course I was so irritated and plunged into ITK (I too know) mode with my sister - Why did she have to see him?? It was uncalled for!!

I remembered when my before before boyfriend (cringe) asked to be friends with me, and I was all shades of strong (blunt), I had never been before, hitting the nail on the head like a carpenter. I was proudly telling my sister about it,  and she was like, "Yasss girll!! You mean!!' My sister is a...  I dunno, let's just say I am such a softie, so she was really proud of how I responded to his 'let's be friends' gist.

This morning, I was thinking about that scene and how quick I was to judge,  because something quite similar happened with one guy like this (and me). We used to... If I say I know what we used to be, I'm lying. We weren't dating, but we used to ... 'hang out' (Kai Uni). That was in year two. So, in year three, when I was with huncu before before boyfriend (cringe), that one called me, and asked to see me, (at night! Oh he was very nocturnal with me, he used to turn to a bat during the day whenever he saw me) I didn't really want to go,  but I just felt I had to be nice.  Nice, not kind.

I went to see him; he talked, I listened. Reminded me of stupid things, was amazed I was over him (he was like a player, bad boy reputation, yunno them now, and me, small girl like me, felt like I could change him. I was 17. Lool). I told him to go straight to the point, huncu wanted me to be friends or something like that. I told him NO.  He asked for goodbye abi farewell kiss, nibo?! I said no and told him that if that was what he came there for, I'd like to be on my way, (oh my God! Inside me ehn, I was like, 'go girl!!') and the he goes, 'Ahn ahn, Lois, it's me o'. I barely him goodnight and walked away. Yunno the way they do in movies na, where the girl would be walking away, and the guy would be calling her name? Exactly! That's how it was.

There was strength and resolve in every step I took. Resolve too. I dunno where ghat came from, but with every step I took, I was proud of myself.  He stopped calling my name of course, and I didn't look back till I got to the entrance of Moremi. We were talking at Archi studio. I couldn't wait to call huncu before before boyfriend to tell him how proud of myself I was. I eventually did, all he heard was the part I mentioned I went to see him. He wasn't interested in my strength. I was madly hurt, but Duh, who cares, I'm pretty sure God was proud if his baby girl.

I think that strength manifests itself differently in people, perhaps, as we grow, it takes different forms. I had no right to be mad at Tiwa. After all, the same thing happened with me.

Sigh* I feel like telling another story, about me, strength, and another boy, someone who used to be a good friend. Abi I should just say it ni?  No, some other time. Maybe this week sef.

BTW, I'm not in any way saying you shouldn't be friends with your exes or what not, after all, some exes eventually become really good friends. It doesn't just sit well with me, personally.


Much love, 
Fifi