On understanding identity and loving culture
Feeling: Blehhhh
Time 9:24am (EAT)
TBH, I'm not one that's really crazy about identity or heritage. I'm a Yoruba girl. The average Yoruba girl; I speak basic Yoruba, you can't really sell me, I like amala, it's my best 'okele', I find it awkward going down on both knees to greet an adult because I just say 'good morning daddy' or 'good morning mommy' to my parents, and get in with the day. I didn't even know Fifeoluwahan was my first name, till the day we went to an hospital and my dad and I were looking for my file all about the place (we found out later that he used my English name as my first name). I was probably 11 years old, and since then, they started addressing me as 'Fifehan'.
Yeah that's about my Yorubaness, and you know what? I think it's not enough. It's not like I'm ashamed to be a Yoruba girl, I'm not proud either. I mean, I'm just there, just a person, and I don't think I should be defined by some form of culture. The irony is, we are actually defined by where we come from. No matter how little the influence is, it's still influence. So why not just let me understand it just a bit?
The funny (or sad, actually) but true thing is that, there are many 'Yoruba' peeps like me. We don't understand our culture ,we don't even attempt to understand. I mean, it's when you understand that you can know what to accept and what not to, yeah?
I wonder why people from other nations embrace their heritage, they enjoy it and are proud (they're not like me, yunno, the I don't care attitude). I'm talking Latinos , French guys, so many others. These guys revel in their culture; their music, their food, their language.. . . I'm even talking the 'cool' people, the youth, not the old people 'who have no choice'.
Maybe I've just let the western mindset rule mine, after all, you'd rarely find me watching Yoruba movies. I read oyinbo books, watch oyinbo movies, sing oyinbo songs, and the mind has a very subtle way of trapping all those things and making them form an integral part of me, so that if I expose myself less to things (asides food) that my culture has to offer me, I would never come to appreciate my own culture.
I was at the hospital yesterday (what's with me, hospitals and my names?), nothing major, don't stress it. As I was about filling my booklet I saw the space for names, there was a little tug of war that was going on in my mind: "Should I write my Yoruba name or not?" I started writing " Marquis Loi..." then I cancelled the 'Loi' and replaced with 'Fifeoluwahan' my amazing first name. Anywhos, I submitted it and the Ugandan receptionist saw it was too long and said, "this name is too long, is it okay if I put the other name?" She was referring to 'Lois', and I said "no, please use the other name, it's my first name." I could hear the angels sing... Okay lemme shut up, but I felt really good.
Here's to being proud of our heritage. *inserts wine glass emoji*
*oyinbo means American. A white person to be precise.
Much love,
Fifi.
Time 9:24am (EAT)
TBH, I'm not one that's really crazy about identity or heritage. I'm a Yoruba girl. The average Yoruba girl; I speak basic Yoruba, you can't really sell me, I like amala, it's my best 'okele', I find it awkward going down on both knees to greet an adult because I just say 'good morning daddy' or 'good morning mommy' to my parents, and get in with the day. I didn't even know Fifeoluwahan was my first name, till the day we went to an hospital and my dad and I were looking for my file all about the place (we found out later that he used my English name as my first name). I was probably 11 years old, and since then, they started addressing me as 'Fifehan'.
Yeah that's about my Yorubaness, and you know what? I think it's not enough. It's not like I'm ashamed to be a Yoruba girl, I'm not proud either. I mean, I'm just there, just a person, and I don't think I should be defined by some form of culture. The irony is, we are actually defined by where we come from. No matter how little the influence is, it's still influence. So why not just let me understand it just a bit?
The funny (or sad, actually) but true thing is that, there are many 'Yoruba' peeps like me. We don't understand our culture ,we don't even attempt to understand. I mean, it's when you understand that you can know what to accept and what not to, yeah?
I wonder why people from other nations embrace their heritage, they enjoy it and are proud (they're not like me, yunno, the I don't care attitude). I'm talking Latinos , French guys, so many others. These guys revel in their culture; their music, their food, their language.. . . I'm even talking the 'cool' people, the youth, not the old people 'who have no choice'.
Maybe I've just let the western mindset rule mine, after all, you'd rarely find me watching Yoruba movies. I read oyinbo books, watch oyinbo movies, sing oyinbo songs, and the mind has a very subtle way of trapping all those things and making them form an integral part of me, so that if I expose myself less to things (asides food) that my culture has to offer me, I would never come to appreciate my own culture.
I was at the hospital yesterday (what's with me, hospitals and my names?), nothing major, don't stress it. As I was about filling my booklet I saw the space for names, there was a little tug of war that was going on in my mind: "Should I write my Yoruba name or not?" I started writing " Marquis Loi..." then I cancelled the 'Loi' and replaced with 'Fifeoluwahan' my amazing first name. Anywhos, I submitted it and the Ugandan receptionist saw it was too long and said, "this name is too long, is it okay if I put the other name?" She was referring to 'Lois', and I said "no, please use the other name, it's my first name." I could hear the angels sing... Okay lemme shut up, but I felt really good.
Here's to being proud of our heritage. *inserts wine glass emoji*
*oyinbo means American. A white person to be precise.
Much love,
Fifi.
Lol... Very funny. But I get your point.. You wanted them to suffer to call your name Yea.. 😀😀😀.
ReplyDeleteSame with me. I actually prefer my Yoruba name, I think it's very beautiful...Adetola, which means the inheritance is equal to wealth or sth along those lines...
But I am very used to being called Rita. It becomes tricky because a day cannot pass without me hearing a statement like. "Ohh so you are Yoruba?", "I always thought you are Igbo oo", "But you don't look Yoruba", "Are you mixed-cultured?"
Why are you now bearing Rita?
Oh God it's exhausting... But I've been called Rita all my life in every single phase.. It would become just more confusing to start spreading my name as Adetola.
But that is one mistake I would never make with me Kids. I've got a list of awesome Yoruba names in store for them. Fifehan happens to be one.😀
Yes girl!! 'Fifehan' , awwnnn. I absolutely agree with the confusion part. And by God's grace, I also won't make the same mistake. By the way, you've got a very beautiful name. Adetola.
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