DEFINING RELATIONSHIPS

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Missed me? Good morning people, how’s your holiday going? Please don’t let it go to waste, maximize it, thank you (I’m such a chicken, why the thank you?), my exam is in two days, almost done reading, the revision will start today, the library ain’t open
I’ll be doing something different today, and hopefully, you’ll enjoy it.  Have you guys(either male or female) ever been in a very weird relationship with someone, so much that you don’t know what is happening, whether you guys are exclusive or not, or you’re friends? Trust me; it’s the most confusing thing ever. So, that’s what I wanna talk about (hehehe, some people’s ears have stretched already, you people like relationship talk too much jere) maybe I shouldn’t even talk about it again…okay, okay, calm down, I was just kidding… BTW, I’m not being specific; I’m just talking about what happens generally among youths and older teens.
    Okay, let’s start. If relationships with people started like this, life would be easier:
BOY: good morning, my name is this or that; I’m in this department, in that level
GIRL: (Oh God, all these lame toasters sef, I’m not in the mood joh, fakes a smile) hullo, nice to meet you
BOY: Your name?
GIRL: My name is this or that
BOY: I always see you around, and I just thought to come over to say hello, I’d like to be your friend
GIRL: Oh okay!
BOY: oh btw, I have a girlfriend, and she says she knows you.
GIRL: YAAAAYYYYY! HE doesn’t like me
See how the guy stylishly inserted the fact that he has a girlfriend, that’s awesome!!! so they both know they’re not in for any relationship, it will be annoyingly tragic to find out eventually that the guy has a girlfriend when the girl is already liking the guy… Abeg guys please don’t break our hearts now, make your intentions known, if you want us to be friends, let us be, and if you are interested in the girl in a not-so-platonic level, abeg let her know. Confusion = madness. Even if you don’t have a girlfriend, abi fiancée still make it known, God bless you in advance, ehen it goes the same way for girls, there are some overly touchy-feely girls, abegi please reduce it and don’t lead the poor guy on( it’s called deceit, and no matter how subtle, God hates it)
Thanks for reading my lecture dearies, boobye it’s already 8:51am…
                                                                                   Proud violator of the Gricean maxims
                                                                                   MARQUIS FIFEOLUWAHAN LOIS

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